the first
back 2 bulletpoint writing

Cal Fucks Up a Statue And Nearly Gets Caught By the Po Po

<character description>

(this is a description yoinked from another bulletpoint fic that I Haven't Finished Yet but it fits my purposes for Telling You What You Need To Know)

Cal's wearing a punk vest on top of a pink long-sleeve, with the usual jeans. a binder peeks out from the collar

he's also got some boots

his fur is a very dark brown, black until you look at it closely, with a big poofy tail striped with white

a black bag patterned with lightning-like filaments is slewed over his back, shaped like a weird harp or something

some examples of his patches: the classic ACAB, anarchism symbol, etc. a variant of trans flag that has a lightning-bolt aspect (representing, in a phrase, "aggressive transness"), some band patches, etc

</character description>

Cal looked up at the statue

it was of some cunt who fought for the confederates

bastards had kept the statue for however long

he'd asked earlier about how to quote 'fuck up some concrete'

Taps, after a while of hemming and hawing, had given him a big file of exactly how concrete corrodes

of course

he didn't understand it

he wasn't much of a chemist

but Melanie helped a little and he thinks he's got it figured out.

Cal looks around for any cameras

he always made sure the popo never saw magic

of course his punkvest already marked him for cop meddling

but on a workday in work hours, there weren't too many people in the park

only Fate's meddling could sic the heat on him now

ah, there was a ding

an intersection had a camera that not only caught Every Car that would Ever run its redlight

it also would catch him if he didn't take care of it

he took a something out of his bag

it was a zither dyed so it had a smooth gradient from rose to its normal wooden beige color

on the front was "COMB STINGER" in a graffiti block-letter

a paper clipboarded onto the instrument took the place of frets

the distances between each 'fret' looked squished, and they were sloped to follow the ends

two of the strings had a slightly different tint and sound to them than the others

each was capped with a small implement not unlike a skeletal metal xylophone

Cal had flipped them up and aimed them at the camera

he engaged the pair of strings with a half-dollar coin

as he started playing he watched the camera, seemingly trying to figure something out

he did have a basic intuition for this but it still took a bit

eventually he saw some smoke begin to come off of the plastic shell of the camera

satisfied, he pushed the coin an infinitesimal amount forward, changing each tone by a couple of cents

he stopped playing after about 10 seconds

the camera was definitely fucked up. nonmagic magic smoke seeped from where the wire met it

eventually someone would figure out it was tampered with and investigate, but nobody would think of a Directed Energy Wzither. there was a good chance it'd be thought of as a freak electrical cockup

Cal switched focus to the statue

he put away his zither, flipping the antennae to be flush with the body

then pulled out various bottles of decidedly not water, some of them in decidedly not water bottles

he also dredged up a weird little tool

it looked like someone mated a cranked miniradio(?) with a reciprocating bugzapper(??) and made it out of printer plastic, which wasn't too far off from the truth

if you extended the concept of power words to power tools this one would be power tool chemistry

so. Cal looked upon the stuffs he'd strewn out and mused on what to do

Taps said that concrete had many ways of corrosion based on what was in it

but a good bet was to use carbonated water and sulfuric acid

so Cal did that, spilling the water and notwater onto the statue

he pointed the chemtool at the statue

started winding it (which was quite a job)

and at first, nothing happened.

but then it bubbled

and fizzed

and then he heard a shout from a bit away

whizzed around


it was what he hoped most not to see

Da Popo.

    "Stand still! You're coming with me, punky-boy!"


it was good to be unclocked

but he couldn't tell if it was because the cop was just an ignorant fuck

or because he thought only cis men could be punk


either way, Cal spun upwards from his sitting position, grabbed the tool, and immediately booked it, leaving the cop fumbling for his taser or gun

who could tell which

these days it was a coinflip whether a cop would be homocidal or not

time to put his parkour skill to use

he lept the fence, which was easy enough, and immediately was looking for the next thing to put between him and the bastard

he elected to run by a wall for a bit, boosting himself with a hand, if nothing else to gain from the jay

Cal thought a little about how he'd get out of this, after putting the tool in his zither bag

the cop definitely saw his tail, there was no getting around that

he had a facemask on so he was kinda fine on that matter

he'd never said anything so his voice wasn't known

but he definitely had to lose this fucker before he got back to the Twatcave (it was a working title)

far behind him

    "You wont get away from me, asshole!"

he heard the click of a taser being fired,

felt the thud of it hitting his back

felt nothing as his vest took most of the impalement,

and heard the cop yell

    "You, you, you motherfucker!"

he kept running, taking out his pocketknife

ideally he'd cut the wires in one fell swoop

he was probably safe since it was already stuck in his vest

but he muttered an appeal to Fate anyways

one, two, zing!,

and he was fine

the cop wasn't. ever since he took the taser running he's heard a constant stream of swears

he looked around for a way out. no dice

he had to vanish, and quick.


he cursed under his breath

he didn't like using his own magic

it gives him half a migraine

but he had nothing else.

he dips into an alleyway

checks for cameras

readies himself

and the hand he's used to boost off the wall

he digs into the mortar between the bricks

tears it open

and in goes his hand, his self, and his bag

through the mortar, into the Mortar

after him, he closes it right back up

and in an instant,

he didn't exist in the material world anymore.